The Toughest Hunt To Crack
by supernaturalsammy67
Summary: Skag Trendy's fic challenge: the ultimate supernatural disaster. They Hunt. Mr Bean's Teddy. but hes got tricks up his furry lil sleeves, but will Sam and Dean save London...or fall victim themselves...take place from Skag Trendy's Witch finder-Angst.Crac
1. Chapter 1

**ello, chappies n chap-esses. This is the day, you will finally know us writers have lost it...**

**well, I never really had it, so...lol**

**just a lil bit of something huge, a friend has cooked up...and sort of challenged us all...**

**this my friends to be, or if you hate my fics, not to be...is the looniest idea sprang and grown and blossomed from another's head.**

**thats right- not me!**

**Skag Trendy- you all know her, how could you not! has come up with this wonderful lil idea...so heres my big story...evil laugh**

**All credit to Skag, her wow mind has come up with this baby...hehe**

**Summary: Skag Trendy's fic challenge: the ultimate supernatural disaster. They Hunt. Mr Bean's Teddy. but hes got tricks up his furry lil sleeves, but will Sam and Dean save London...or fall victim themselves...take place from Skag Trendy's Witch finder- amazing**

**Disclaimer: I lost the ownership deeds in a poker match with kripke...and i wanted to play strip...curse me**

**Warning: language and extra strange weird happenings probably not found in any sane mind...**

**except me! big grin**

**thanks to Chailyn, for all the advice, encouragement and laughter ya give me in my life as well as a close nutter friend and fellow friend in certain fics...with the lads xxxxxxxxxxxxx hehe...**

**on we go...**

**i feel this story is like that rollercoaster you always want to go on, then ya brave enough to, and just before it sets off, your strap comes loose and your up in the air...it never ends well and it wont be a fairly relaxed ride, but ya glad ya did it!**

**The Toughest Hunt to Crack**

The brother's had been taking it easy for a while, a new job presented itself further North, and on to London where a certain circus had been having unfortunate accidents involving sheep and bearded ladies, Sam and Dean found it laid back and quickly finished the salt and burn and the oddest looking remains they'd ever seen, they never in their lives expected to see who they bumped into...well crashed into rather, they didn't intend to stay for a long time in London, Jay was missing Sam and Dean guessed why, the last night he'd shared with Jay he couldn't sleep for the sounds coming out of that room.

This is the story, of the day they met the man who could even beat them, they never thought a hunt would present itself the way it did...they still have the scars.

Metally, so to speak.

June 10th, Picidilly square.

5:05 Am.

"Sam, just lemme' drive, jeesh if i'd have known you'd be this squirmy when we got here i'd have left you with Jay"

That earned a quick fire smirk from Sam as he remembered the nights with Jay, and the mornings...the breaks, the lunches...the 5 minute get togethers.

But Sam wasn't with her, not today and it appeared not for a long time to come, not if their latest hunt proved anything, apart from the phsyco branding beard ladies and elephant jugglers with god knows what else, they'd been picking up a lot of EMF and the closer they got to Picidilly sqaure, the stronger it became.

That and the aggression level currently radiating off both Winchesters.

Due to a large fact it was London...and Dean was driving.

Not good.

Firstly he'd ran over an old ladies foot, thinking it was...and I do beleive his exact words were "You maniacal garden whore, get off the road you witch" and then succeeded into pissing off the police around Buckingham Palace...and ofcourse the whole while, driving on the wrong side of the road and so far taken out:

Two bikes, three horses and four blind mice, although they looked like huge mutant rats and in London probably were the Labour party.

All in all, it started off as a great day, compared to what happened next.

Suddenly deciding he was hungry Dean pulled off endlessly circling the roundabout and jutted to a stop at a spacey alley entrance and exited the car, Sam in tow.

With a blast from a high pitched horn, both brothers immediatley recognised the flying mini as it sped in a zig-zag motion toward the Impala.

"Sam?" Dean almost growled, the driver was...in the back as far as they could see, and only a tuft of brown fur hung over the steering wheel. "Sam...?" Dean insisted.

"I see it Dean...your not mad" But it didn't make the scene any less in-sane.

"Sam...he...it's getting kinda' close..." Dean spared a glance in Sam's direction and the kid almost looked comical, slack hawed and eye's glued.

The next words even shocked Dean, in that I'm-so-not-suprised-i'm-a-Winchester look.

"A teddy bear's driving Dean..." Sam voiced and they both gawped as the car sped past and careened back into a full u-turn.

They heard a garbled and muffled voice scream its horror as the car sped by and a guy pressed against the back window with a big nose and a mole.

"Sam...that's Mr.Beans teddy..."

Sam's neck swung back to look at his brother so fast he was sure it would break.

"You know him!" It just kind of blurted out.

"NO!...everyone know's Mr. Bean...I didn't know his teddy could drive" Dean seemed the ponder it thoughtfully as the mini continued now in circles and its human occupant screaming in his annoying throaty jibberish and being thrown around in the back.

"Dean!...teddy's cannot drive, do you see a camera crew?...no, it's rigged Dean. It's gotta' be. Toys cannot come to life"

Even as he Sam said those words they could feel the world freeze, the internal voice gasping like he'd just said 'I don't believe in Fairies' in front of tinkerbell and Peter Pan.

They'd just fucked with fate, and as the mini engine suddenly stopped its grumble and stopped and the screams ending with a thud in the back, the drivers door opened and the brothers stared.

"Sam...I think you pissed it off" Dean said and involantarilly took a step back, peering over Sam's shoulder Dean witnessed two sets of furry feet touch the ground.

The full bustling street suddenly was empty and the clouds were even starting to grey. Well it was bloody england, picture a murderer losing his faveourate knife...and it's raining.

The mini's door slammed and a hateful black eyed, black eyebrowed frown came into view.

"Oh FUCK. Sam RUN!" The brothers spun and tried to make it into the alley before the little possessed physco bear got to them.

As it happens...luck wasn't on their side, and the author wanted some angst.

Dean felt himself lift off from the ground like he weighed nothing. Slamming into the brick alley wall and sliding onto a dumbster rounded lid and then resting in a boneless heap he got a front row view as Sam was plucked from the ground where Dean was just stood and as Sam flipped in the air he landed with a sickening echoeing thud that reverberated through his chest and as he fell Sam let out an 'Ooomphhf' as he seemed to bounce off the wall and land partially on Dean.

Dean reached half concussed into his pocket and retreived the holy water. At the first sign of the silver flask the bear gave one final fling of its paw and spun on its heels...erm...padded feet?

The last thing Dean saw was a man walking like he had inverted knee's and making 'Oooh' and 'Gah' noises as he walked up close and personal, Dean got a close up of a mole before he fell to oblivion.

**Thank you very much for reading munches, hope you enjoyed, if ya want drop me a review, chappy two is already in the works x**

**thanks x**

**hehe**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, this is chappy two of The Toughest Hunt To Crack...hope you've enjoyed so far x**

**THANK YOU TO YOUR REVIEWS!**

**I've taken a picture of myself with every one, yeah...sure.**

**No, but i do love them and thank you to all that do review, it means someone out there is reading...hehe**

**anyway...warnings of strange situations...and this chappy has a bit more angst...**

**aww dear...OMG i nearly got run over by David Hassalhouff today!...well it looked like him!**

**i pictured the whole baywatch running away scene...eh? any of you lovely readers think Sam and Dean would be good on baywatch...wanna take the risk and try it out? lol**

**thanks guys x**

**As always, this fic is introduced and inspired by Skag, her ideas are like gold plated Sammy's...or ya' know the chocolate kind x**

**heres more x**

**all errors and annoying mistakes or anything at all wrong, my bad. inoccent grin**

**Any sorry if i do take longer with this fic than it should...exams are nearly here and suprise suprise, its true to all those out there revise! cos the exmas come up on ya like a fat flying pigeon...:)**

Previously-

The last thing Dean saw was a man walking like he had inverted knee's and making 'Oooh' and 'Gah' noises as he walked up close and personal, Dean got a close up of a mole before he fell to oblivion.

NOW

Sam felt the strange sensation of being tugged, he heard a throaty voice moving his arms and balancing his body on something...wriggly?

"There, thats better, masterpeice" Was that Mr. Bean...what?

Sam tried to move his arms but they were hung down off of something, soft...and wriggly, and warm?...?

The next thing Sam felt was his face resting on something, moving and hard.

"De-"

Dean's eyes snapped open to the choked plea, but as soon as he looked up, he was facing nose to nose, and being sat on by...

"SAM!" Dean jumped and bucked his body and Sam felt the wriggly floor shift as he was flung over the side of Dean, hitting the motel carpet with a padded thud and pained cry.

"Jesus...you tranna give me a heart attack!" Dean screeched as he sat up, rubbing the back of his head and finding the guessed lump.

"AH...Dean..." Sam gasped, curling in on his side.

"Sammy?..." Sudden dread and fear sank in his stomach, Dean leant over the side of the mattress in time to see Sam's features tighten and for his baby brother to curl up in a fetal position.

"Sam...? SHIT...SAM!" Dean rolled, legs hitting the thread bare carpet and landed next to Sam, Dean cradled his head and felt the large egg sized bump on the back of Sam's head.

"Jesus christ Sam, who knew a teddy could throw you that far!" Dean said, the top corner of his lip trying to shed some light on the situation, when Sam smiled back at his attempt it was more like a grimace.

"My teddy...he's gone all wobbly dooh-dah, it's evil..."

A smiling five foot something man in a faded patched suit frowned in the brother's direction.

Dean whipped his head both ways. "Where the hell did you come from?"

"Oh..I brought you here!...look see masterpeice!" Mr.Bean showed them a poleroid of them stacked on top of each other on one of the beds. "It's all in the balance" He winked and stepped back, sticking the photo on the wall with pink and blue bubblegum.

Dean's mouth hung open, one eyebrow steadily rising. "it was your teddy- no...your toy...you brought us here...is this for real?"

Mr.Bean seemed confused, then broek into a toothy smile and made a 'geeeeeeee' sound, his eyes getting wider.

"I've put your car outside, it wouldn't fit in the space, but now it does..." he rubbed his hands together, tongue out like a wild 3 year old.

Dean gulped.

"Oh god. What did you do?...Bean?" Sam even held back his pain to smile at the look of horror on his brothers face.

Mr.Bean lifted back the moth eaten curtain and Dean almost...almost here gals, fainted.

He damn near had another panic attack because the impala wasn't even in any way assuming 'parked'.

It was vertical, over 3 tonnes of unibody steel swinging by it's hooked fender from a crane, just outside there room.

"OH MY GOD!" Dean's heart rate sped up dramatically, Sam could hear and _feel _it.

"Dean...it's ok...we'll get it down" Sam whispered, trying to calm the elder sibling.

"Oh no worries, I can put it down now" The Beanster reached in his pocket and brought out a huge shiny red buttoned remote with a large warning sticker. he removed the sticker pouting out his lower lip and blowing a rasberry and let it fall to the floor.

Both winchesters screamed at the man but he already decided and pushed the button, with an exploding grin.

Dean fell back onto the carpet opposite Sam and heaved a sigh, tears boarding on his eye's. "My-my c-car..."

The sound of crushing metal and grinding glass, will be forever stuck echoing in his memory.

Mr.Bean sighed. "I can fix that!" He pointed up in the air and ran outside, coming back with a box of plasters and band aids. "All better!" he laughed.

"Oh god, please kill me now...I can't take much more of him"

Sam frowned on his own bed, since the car incident, Mr.Bean had superglued Sam to the bed, Dean partly to the headbaord and his boots and broken every workable appliance apart from the lights.

"I didn't think you were the religious type" Sam squinted, his headache was still lingering and his ribs seemed to break every time he took a breath, his shoulder thudded with his heartbeat and Dean was being pissy.

Great.

"Oh, ha ha, very friggin' funny Sam! we can't leave here cos' that frickin' bear'll be back, he won't let us go and we can't move!" Dean shouted, hands constantly stringing through his hair.

"You think your bad!...I can't feel my arm anymore...the only way I know it's attached is the throbbing, I can't see straight and my ribs kill...please don't make me shout again, I think i'll pass out" Sam breathed softly ending his rant.

Dean's anger simmered. "You hurt bad?"

"I don't know Dean...but its better being here than outside when it showed up before, Bean is handy with salt" Sam winced, apart from the bit where he'd sprinkled it over them, salt in your eye's isnt the best beauty secret.

"Yeah...before he blinded us with it though"

"Are you ok?" Sam asked, suddely feeling the urge to ask, he couldnt even reach for Dean and the lack of contact made him feel restricted and closed in.

"Yeah...nothing a few weeks rest and a good tequella won't fix...think I got a concussion though bro'. I'm seeing friggin' stars" Dean puffed and relaxed into the pillows and headboard, Sam followed suite.

A few hours later it was nearly nightfall again and Dean was warning the Beanster to protect himself , or at least them from the killer teddy striking again.

After a few starts and failed attempts to salt exits and entrances, then painting the walls in rainbows and carebears which Dean had threatened to rip up, chew up their faces and then spit them out to feed to a hungry mountain lion, Mr.Bean had stopped and carried on drawing Devil's traps as Dean hastilly instructed, he tried to ignore the huge red heart inside one of them.

But he still cringed when he saw it, and the way Bean had gone all gooey eyed and soft, sighing contentedly and smiling like his first love had come back to him.

Dean snickered. _Love._

The closest love he ever knew was Sam and dad...and that wasn't love as such, more like a blood red heart armoured up with spikes and trap grenades.

It wasn't safe to delve into _love _with their father.

But Sam...

Hey, speaking of Sam...

"Sammy?...hey man you ok?" Dean asked, trying to cut through the wooden backboard or escape from his glued jacket, both attemps proved fuitile.

"mmmm...yeah...m'fine" Sam mumbled, seated amoung the ruffled covers, hiding under those shaggy bangs of soft chocolate curls.

(sammy gals...what an image!...do you just want to dive on that that mop and-)

"What are you doing?...I thought I got to take over this writing thing...possess a teddy and rule the world, you promised Miss Sheriff..."

"EH!...don't use my real name you baffoon!...and yes your time will come. Just after I over indulge in Sammy-ness"

"No, I want my promised rulership of all...I am in control now, step away from the screen"

"Errr...no, my brain damaged pal. I ain't goin' nowhere, and you...power? HA...you just want to possess a teddy and Mr.Beans poor thing cos Mr. Blobby beat you up...and don't tell me you've tried to teletubies and those Dora the hitchhiker...or whatever-"

"Explorer"

"what?"

"it's not Dora the hitchhiker, its the explorer..."

"I don't care if it's bloody Dora walking up to M1 and cadging a lift!...if you don't like my rules go and find some other sucker...try the BBC"

"I did"

"No, you tried Cbeebies...and cartoons. Go for the uncensored version..."

"whats that?"

"it's like porn for sock puppets, you'll fit right in there...well?"

"I'll stay with you, but...only if...I can drive Dean's car"

"Ya' what?"

"Drive...umm...Dean's car, please"

"Fine. I don't know how i'm gonna do this!...go back to your cardboard box cut out of hell"

Suddenly Dean saw a cow run past the window, extremely fast. "What the hell?" he took his eyes off Sam a moment, he tugged forward a few time,s hearing his jacket rip, he winced but continued until he felt the last thread give and hobbled up to the window.

A cow...yes a cow on some sort of rocket powered rollerblades zoomed in a cirlced and past the other way.

Dean frowned. "What the hell...is that a remote control car?"

"A car?...ya know I ask you bloody page crew to set up a few scenes...get a few things ready. Remote control car?"  
"Well...we couldnt find any rollerblades so we used computor mouse balls...and we didn't have any rockets so we superglued matches...but"

"Well, this is the 3rd try, and the 3rd cow...oh and we didn't have a cow so it's a donkey...or was it a bull?"

"Yeah...so we stuck 4 remote control cars on it..."

"So...everything I write...it's...wrong?"

"yes"

"Bloody midgets!"

Dean stepped outside and glanced after the cow, it mooed as it spun and flew past him again and a sudden urge made him walke after it.

After all. "Ya don't see that everyday" Dean muttered, eyes wide.

Mr.Beans brown stuffed 1 foot tall grizzly tiptoed on fraid threads across the pavement, it's dark black eye's reflected on the impala as it stared almost, lovingly.

Slowly the little brown bear made it to the driver side door as Dean dissappeared around the motel corner following the Honda sponsered cow.

It started to un-thread itself and slid through the small crack around the doors.

Unravelling itself inside the car, it slowy re-sewed and stuffed back its posture, a small peice of brown cotton lay forgotten on the leather seat. Never to be attached again.

Using it's stitches it started the engine through the key hole and revved it, the black thick woolen smile widened as it screeched off past the motel.

It couldnt even see over the wheel.

"Ya see, you stupid teddy!...Dean is gonna' blame me...yeah, your not gonna' be around when i'm in 6 pieces and fed to pigs are ya! I'll de-string you with a blunt needle you little fucker, if you make one hair of a scratch on that car i'll bury you with a kitten and five angry lions"

Dean heard the familiar screech of tires and deserted the cow, who was now rolling as the batteries died to a stop next to the wall.

Running back around the corner he caught the impala skimming a curb a few feet away and turn right.

"THAT FUCKIN BEAR!"  
"Now ya see Dean, there's two of us..."

"Make that three...Dean, what happened?" Sam said, trying to stand comfortably whilst several of the hotel's pillows stuck up from his back.

"Ahhhh where the hell did you get here..?"

"Shhhh, your meant to write this, not join in...Damn bear took the car, how did you get free?" Dean stood next to his brother and tried to tug off the excess poof of the cushions.

"Bean, he was running around with scissors and they fell near me, last I saw he had some sticky tape and a really big...erm...I think it was a smile" Sam winced at the memory, huge teeth jutted out and tongue, saliva dribbled and his eyes popped out.

Dean walked them back to their room and cursed himself for falling for the old 'remote control cow' trick.

Before Dean entered, they was no sign of Bean and he thought they might of got lucky and maybe the bear got him.

Locking the door with a sigh behind them, Sam trailed to his massacred bed and laid back suddenly screaming and curling up in fear.

Grinning down on them, taped to the ceiling with thousands of strips of tape, lay Mr.Bean, his free hand waved gidily.

"Heloooo"

Dean slapped his forehead with his palm.

"You stupid turnip!"

**END- of this chapter hahha**

**lol, more soon i hope x**

**hehe..even i dont know...school is hectic, and life is full**

**x**

**so, if ya want to request a fic, go ahead, i'll do my best to write it up for ya, i promise i'll do that, it just might take a week or two x**

**THANKs for reading guys x**

**heeh**


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